It's ok.

Now that was a hard week.

Benign.

I really thought that that was it - the kind of results that mean, "Sally, you are now going to die." I also had my CT scan on Friday which will tell me the state of the Lymphoma. I will know the re-"sluts" of Mama dreadly on Friday, the 21st. I am in denial and the emotion of all this only grabs me fleetingly. When it does, I act like a damn fool and cry when I shouldn't. I don't let on to my family just how scary this has been and so they think I'm just fine.

That is the way I like it, but (frankly) cancer is just not fun. It is a mind-bender. If you can get the death/fear out of your mind, you can run around like everything is just peachy. Hey, I don't work, I spend like a drunken fool, I work out, paint, write and basically just play. I play with my grandchildren when I feel like it, which is all the time.

I dunno. I think my life is pretty fantastic for the big C..

Here's my beeeeeautiful family. Suffering? Not really too bad. I'm good at smiling through it. With this much family entertainment, I can forget about it pretty easily.